Do you have a budget? Are you faithful to it? Or do you feel budgeting is over-rated? If you have a budget, why do you have one? And if you do not have a budget, why not?
During my first marriage, my ex-husband and I married young, well what now seems very young. Back then, 22 and 24 was not really considered young to marry. When I look at Sonny-boy and think that I was married about his age… YIKES! is my only thought!
We were fresh out of college, I worked full time at a less than great job (with fantastic benefits), he worked part time and did not get a full time job until we had been married almost six months.
With our lack of funds came a great need to budget. The only problem was, even though we were decently educated household budgeting was not exactly a course offered at my college, although I wish it had been. Oh sure I had a class session or two that dealt with a household budget in my business accounting classes, but nothing that really stuck. This meant I had to learn to budget through trial and error. And let me tell you, there was a lot of error.
I was always underestimating real costs and praying my ex would get decent overtime. It was a skin-of-your-teeth approach, but it worked … barely. Once Sonny-boy was born we were really, really poor and skin-of-your-teeth was fast becoming more like robbing Peter to pay Paul. I had stopped working and we were relying on one income that was not all that great. I started couponing so we might eat. My ex-husband’s entire income went to pay the rent, utilities and whatever credit card debt we had. A budget was born of desperation. I needed to account for every penny we spent as our budget was that tight. Even a swing of ten unaccounted dollars could pose dire consequences.
Over the years, his income increased dramatically and I went back to work part-time. The budget relied less and less on rebates to pay bills, and went strictly for food costs. By then, couponing had become so ingrained in our way of life that I never did budget for food. By this I mean I did not use paycheck money to shop for food; coupons and rebates paid for what we ate. I had enough of a stockpile to have the luxury of not shopping when rebate funds were low and the ads were not full of free/cheap items.
I budgeted during my first marriage due to early extreme need, without any past budgeting experience. In the end, budgeting allowed us to purchase a house, buy new cars and put Sonny-boy through private schools.
We just started budgeting about 6 weeks ago. We switched to a cash only, envelope budgeting system to really challenge ourselves to be more careful about our spending. In that time, we already have been able to start a nice savings account to have in case of emergencies, pay a hefty tax bill, and we’re going to Disneyland in a couple weeks. It’s amazing how much money you can waste when you’re not watching every penny.
Thanks to you, we have been able to set our grocery budget pretty low now that I know how to shop at CVS, Rite Aid, Walgreens, Target… I’m enjoying the challenge of getting the most for my limited grocery budget rather than just getting every deal that looked appealing.
When we were first married we followed a budget, and I was a couponer as well. Somewhere as time went on the budget as well as couponing were lost skills. I guess as he and I made more money I did not feel the need. I was always very aware of what we had and did not have to spend, but as far as exact numbers I could not produce them. In this recent downturn of the economy we both lost our jobs and the “what now” feeling came quickly. He was laid off a couple of months before I was, and when I did a budget for the first time in years I was so embarassed. We were fine, basically i learned that my income paid all our bills and we basically just wasted his each month…so sad! Luckily I was a saver and we had a nest egg because 2 months later I was laid off. Coupons became a way of life again…the problem was that I did not follow the sales like I really should. I shopped only once every 5-6 weeks. Even though I would cut typically 35% off the bottom line I could have been doing better. Then one day it is like it clicked, I don’t know what happened but I saw the drugstores as a game and realized between them and the grocery store if I shopped weekly and really followed the sales I could do even better. I always stockpiled (sorta) but now have an organized one. I have a goal for this summer of $100 a month on food and hba items, preferably less. It is just the 2 of us and we have planted a large garden so I want to get the food costs way down so I can divert that money to credit card debt that we accrued towards the end of my unmployment when things were getting very very lean. If I can do that then once the garden stops producing and hopefully I have plenty of veggies in the freezer I won’t have to increase the food budget by too much. lately the grocery stores have not been all that exciting and I am getting a little frustrated. I spent $22 yesterday at Kroger, and honestly did not get all that much, I hope there are some freebies soon so I can stock up because I am ready to put my plan into action and lately I have not had many deals worth stockpiling.
Last fall, my husband and I took Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace University (FPU). I wish I had heard of it years ago. By the time we took the class, we had settled 50K+ credit card debt and we were working on eliminating student loans. We were doing all that without a budget (which led to a couple phone calls to parents, “the kids need…I need to go to the dentist….”). My husband loves his job as a forensic scientist for the state, but it certainly is not glamorous, nor does it pay great; however, benefits are very good. We share one car—my husband’s coworker graciously offered to drive him twice a week so I could get the car! I chose to stay home to raise our kids—22 months and 3 yrs. When we took FPU, I realized we were spending $400 a month on groceries; that did not include toiletries. We made a budget and at the same time I found deal bloggers! Today our grocery store/drug store budget is $200 a month, which will go continue to go down. My stockpile is doing well and with the money I get from rebates, we are getting shelving and I already bought some Cansolidators! I also have a $40 giving budget every month—I cannot believe how much we have been able to give!
I’m still having trouble sticking to couponing etc. For me it’s difficult especially being preggo – I just don’t have the energy to do everything I need to and hence a lot of things expire, not a lot of cooking, cleaning etc. As a result, DH & I have been spending more than we should be on food. Also, our medical bills are high and I have to figure out something with this. I may need my sister’s help who is in the medical profession. I think once those 2 are under better control, that will cut our expenses. I actually had energy to cook a few times this weekend, and while I had to spend money to get the ingredients, it was definitely a good start to cutting take-out expenses. I definitely think life stages does factor into it. I do well with saving on DD’s stuff which is better than nothing. I spend very little on myself & have a good stockpile in H&B category except Cetaphil & Cerave for DD. But I definitely need to do something about the food expense & medical as a start and soon. Sometimes I just hate living in metro NY – just too costly for everything.
I TRY to budget. We live paycheck to paycheck and have a little bit of debt but we paid most of that with this years tax returns. I have to be honest and say that although a wonderful guy, hubby is TERRIBLE with money! We are both 25(I am as of today• Yay) and have 2 kids ages 6 months and 21 months. I have always been pretty good with money and paying things on time although I just started couponing about 2 years ago. We literally have $76 dollars in the bank, $12 in my purse and hubby has a few dollars in his wallet. When we were living in cleveland, ohio last year and in 2008 we lived downtown where parking tickets are pretty much a normal weekly thing( for my hubby atleast)
every time I would try to save a little bit of money it would be gone within a week or 2 because of a darn ticket. The thing that frustrated me was I couldn’t control it. So this year I put my foot down(or so I thought) and told hubby that from now on I think it would be best if he just kept the bare minimum in the bank (he has a spending habit as well) for bills, rent and a $50 cushion just incase something we forgot about goes through. Then he was to give me what is left over so that I can use it for groceries, toiletries, baby formula, and diapers and save whatever is left over. I recorded every penny spent and in what category it fell so I could come up with a reasonable budget amount. I did this for january and february and I was spending about $20 a week for everything other than bills and gas. I started to try and save again and because I was doing so well with coupons, I was able to save a couple hundred every 2 weeks (hubby is paid biweekly) which was great for us. Then come the bank overdrafts($100′s down the drain) because hubby insists on using his card for nonsense(without keeping track of it) like renting 2 or 3 redbox movies at a time knowing that we will only have time to watch 1 within the time period given to watch/return, gas station purchases ( the biggest waste of money) like a $3 20 oz think of pop. The list goes on but I just realized that instead of just answering the question, I have started to vent¤ sorry Ann and readers. I guess I just had to get that out 
. If I didn’t use coupons, I am pretty sure we would all have to live with my mother. Hopefully one day my love will get it together!
Amanda – I would suggest trying to listen to Dave Ramsey’s radio program (or even calling in if you can get through). He answers questions from people pretty often who are in a similar situation to you and has some pretty good suggestions on how to approach your spouse when you’re not on the same page about money. I would have to imagine that this is a huge stress for you. Good luck!
YES! I budget and have always budgeted, I was on my own early in life (16) and at first it was by necessity. Now, 35 years later, it has become a lifestyle.
But most importantly, in addition to budgeting is that I SAVE. Having the discipline to regularly contribute to a savings account is crucial to any budget’s sucess. No matter how poor you are (and sixteen yr olds on their own can be pretty darn poor) you MUST put money away. Even if it’s just $5 or $10/wk.
The thing about budgets is that it doesn’t factor in those ‘unforseen’ things in life. (I think this is why most people have so much difficulty maintaining a budget.) The way I handle it is that the budget is for regular recurring things and the ‘emergency savings account’ is for the unexpected.
My husband and I have had tremendous success w/ this method.
OH! And one more thing. The checking account and such needs to be handled by 1 person in the household. It’s way too easy to get messed up when two hands are in the pot. Even couples w/ great communication skills…it’s an invitation to failure and conflict.
Good Luck to all who decide to take better control of their finances-but know this: If we can do it, you can too!
Amanda, I just had a thought. How about packing a lunch box w/ soda and snacks for your husbands work/car. Maybe that will cut down on the ‘gas station’ purchases? (But watch out! Maybe he’ll put on weight too…LOL)
Jaime, thank you. I will have to catch his show. I will for sure try calling…hey you never know.
Barbee, thank you for the advice. I do usually make extra for dinner every night so that we can eat leftovers for lunch but he forgets to get it together and take it quite often. I used to get his lunches together before my second son was born but that was 6 months ago so I should start doing that again for him. We are both late for everything so it would probably be for the best and hopefully will cut down on random snack purchases. Oh and I would not mind him gaining a little weight. We are like jack sprat and his wife. Lol.
Amanda, I think you are in my area (buffalo area). If so Dave is on Monday thru Friday from 1:00 to 3:00 on FM 99.5.
Yes, I am in Tonawanda. Thanks Dawn! I have never heard his show before so we will see. Maybe you will hear me if I ever get through
I created a realistic budget this past month (like I used to when we were first married) which I really hadn’t done in a while. Before recently, the only thing I budgeted was groceries. And before that, I didn’t even budget groceries. My “goal” was $400 a month, which I could never stick to and so I stopped keeping track.
Now I try to stick to my $60/week grocery budget as much as possible.
I believe it is too difficult to balance a checkbook when numerous people (or even 2) are using debit cards here, there, and everywhere. That is just my opinion tho.
So together, my husband and I came up with a reasonable amount of money we take out as cash each Sunday night, and split it up into categories – groceries, parking at work for each of us, his spending money, our weekend money, etc. We do still use our bank card for gas (actual fuel – not gas station purchases, lol), which we keep track of, but that is basically the only purchases we make w/ our cards.
We decided together how much was reasonable to withdraw each week, for each category. This also forces us to recognize how much we are spending on things, like snacks and drinks, groceries, whatever. This has worked so well for us! No more gas station purchases! So as much as I hate to buy Mountain Dew I find a way to get a better deal than the gas station (that is not very hard). It is also important that I have things available for my husband to take w/ him so that he doesn’t have to stop at a gas station every day.
Also a Dave Ramsey tip is to always to spend your money on paper before spending it for real. I do this every month. I find this so helpful and really helps us to stick to our budget since we know it’s possible – it’s staring us in the face – and we would have to make changes to our “plan” if we go astray from it. I have found, though, that to stick to it, it has to be reasonable for us, it doesn’t just include bills, gas, groceries and that’s it b/c that isn’t reasonable for us (we do spend money out too!).
We budget b/c if we don’t, it’s too easy to spend way more money than is necessary. Of course, there have been times for us when doing so was really necessary too. But I only recently learned how great coupons and rebates can be.
I also budget and coupon b/c now that I know how much we can save, I feel bad for not doing it! It is fun to me as well, I really enjoy it.
yes budgeting is very important. since it is only my hubby and I, i spend 300 on groceries and misc items too. we also have a eating out amount and we both get an allowance. its good because i am less likely to go way beyond our means and it makes me more aware of what i’m purchasing and how much it cost. it has given us extra to fall back on when we need it. and couponing did come as a result of living from paycheck to paycheck, and i searched for ways to save. To ever go back? never, but i wish i was taught this sooner, but i’m glad that i’m still young to have found this way of life. paying full retail is not my favorite thing to do.
My dad dragged me to a Dave Ramsey seminar when I was 13 and bought me Financial Peace. I’m one of the few people I know (my age) without credit card debt. Being single, it’s easy to have a budget and stick to it. I’m 23 and cannot imagine being married! It’s one thing to have a boyfriend, but marriage is … so permanent.
@ Amanda: I have had the same problem with my husband over the years with frivolous convenience store purchases and bank overdrafts resulting in 100s p/m in bank overdraft fees. He now is in the habit of carrying a cooler with a few sodas in his vehicle and we both instructed the bank we did not want overdraft protection as of last month. I prefer being embarrassed at the store rather than paying 35.00 for a .55 receipt. You can opt out of overdraft protection and it will not let the transaction go through.